Friday, April 22, 2016

he said " you stir me"

it made me happy....
but you know...
when you know its impossible to be together...
it is almost impossible..

the love that remains..
thats where i am..

i have deep ache in my heart when i think of him..
how and why we are not together, i wonder...
my only true love...

i can keep crying thinking of us..

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

A letter from an ex boy friend.

The day I came to know his mother passed away..
I wrote him a letter with my broken English...

And here is what he responds to me...

I hope you read and internalise the details. 

I did receive your email last week. I read through it and purposefully chose to not reply to the garbage that had more to speak about your feelings rather than the situation at hand. 

I did meet with friends in tvm over the last few days. All of them did tell me that you called in to break the news and talked at length. 

The same was mentioned to me by people who send condolences over whatsapp, FB and email based on your communication to them. 

To be honest I was annoyed but I chose to keep quiet. 

Now you have picked my number and called me. I am not sure who passed it on. I can only think of Manoj at the moment. 

It shouldn't be hard for anyone as intelligent as you to know that I did not want you to call considering I never responded to the email or never made an attempt to establish contact in a whole year. 

Since you don't respect my choice I do feel the need to make a few things very clear so that you understand that all this is nothing but annoyance. 

1. I don't have any intentions to be acquainted with you in whatsoever manner. You are certainly not the kind I want to be associated at all.

2. My personal opinion of you is that you are clinically  self absorbed, deceitful and parasitic and not worthy of my friendship, trust nor time and I refuse to be corrected on it because I have known you over time in multiple capacities. 

3. I keep in touch with people that I consider important and I do communicate with them significant incidents in my life at an appropriate time.  I do not need any help in this regard from you. Your gestures are all inappropriate and uncalled for. There have been other instances last year where you have tried to poke your nose with a couple of friends and I ignored it as juvenile behaviour. 

4. I lead a very contended life doing things that keeps me useful to others and myself and hopefully if things go big I might have more socially responsible roles to play in the future. I make very conscious efforts to erase all traces of my past that could potentially present roadblocks in my future journey.  You certainly belong to the past which I have buried keeping my future in mind. 

I have been very respectful of your space and I request you to do the same with me. 

I am marking Manoj in this email for very obvious reasons. I do know that you are friends with Manoj and Amritha. If you don't stop playing these games, I will have to offload my annoyance on Manoj which won't be a nice situation to have considering that we share the same working space. 

I don't enjoy writing this email as its filled with contempt and I hope this will be the last of its kind. In the whole last year, I have not expressed such strong language to anyone else. I have tried to be as candid as possible so we all know where the line is and how to not annoy each other. 

An apology for the annoyance would be nice.

Good luck with your future.