hey im sick!!

i thought i was fallin ill,
and i was,

incredibly ill im!!
and the pain blooms in my abdomen..
and it burns, n grows like a big banyan tree..
and it burns from it roots to the leaves..

i just feel like to cut it!! cut it from the bottom
the root goes until the edge of my vagina..
and it start bleedin there...

hey sweety..
it says take a pain killer and sleep tight..
oh !!

kill my pain!!

come back..

yea we said its different now.. but,

i never wanted this to fade away..

i never wanted you to go beyond that..

come back.. though we left us..

come back and hug me, my love

come back...

im happy!

im happy

its all about happiness...
my chocolate melts...mmm.. yummy..
im happy...

i love this..
its a rainbow..

orgasm..

i didnt know that i cant go back..

i wish: can i go back where i was?
u say: u can never my dear..
i wish: y? i want to go back to the same time n space..
u say: u cant, coz it doesnt exist anymore..
i wish: ah.. if i go back..?
u say: ull be in a different time and space.. thats all

i wish: its painful...
u say: it is...

c`est la vie..

hmm..

i dont know its life..
i can see that i have started feeling comfort to be alone..
as i was always..

hmm.. last week was strange...
ahhh.. yea im alone..
and i love it..
i love my life..

kani signed inn..

loud..

tonight..

i wanted to cry...

cry loud,

loud...more loud..

more n more...

i miss everything!!

i want to delete this past!!

from recycle bin!!

shut down n restart..

boot again.....

hey u just told me...to prove y i exist!!

i think its impossible for me..

cry loud!

laugh loud!!

hey i smell like "surf excel"

what fun!!!

i dont like to take bath..

i found that i really dont like to take bath...
hmm.. even if its hot.. n im dirty...
stinking... anything goes...
i wont take bath... unless i feel..
hmm... today n yesterday..it was too hot..
n i was walking running here and there...
n too much dirt in me... still no bath...

but u know something...
right now just now..i took a bath...!
i cant believe myself!! huh!!

scared of me!

it seems people are scared of me..

i was thinking...

yea im full of love.. so i can hurt..

as anyone can hurt anyone else..

But i still think y can't u take me as what im..

i cant stop expressing...!!

if u r hurt or if u r scared

yea..may be..

i have to also take it that way..

yea ill...

ill try it that way my freind..

but i wish if you could see me as what it is..

and not be scared...

i told you no...

i turned to see things in different ways too..

tahts my growing..

my learning..

its moving.....

head over heels...

unseen words...
its about a girl who always stayed there on that conrener of the road.....
near coffee day.....
and herself thinking that.. they will turn back once and will see her...
and she is seen!!

flowering...
flowering.....
flowering.......

we are in love..

പച്ച മഴ നീല മഴ

എനിക്ക് സങ്കടം വരുന്നു..

രാവിലെ കൊറേ സങ്കടം
കൊറേ പുട്ടും പഴവും കിട്ടി ...അപ്പൊ പച്ച മഴ
പിന്നെ നീല മഴ..

എനിക്ക് ഒറ്റക്കാവുമ്പോ സങ്കടം പിന്നേം വരുന്നു ...
ഒറ്റക്കല്ലാത്തപ്പോഴും സങ്കടം വരുന്നു....

വരുന്നതു പോവുമായിരിക്കും...
പച്ച ലോല്ലി പോപ്പ് മുട്ടായി കഴിക്കാന്‍ തോന്നുന്നു

live n leave....

mmmm...
i never knew that this would happen to me..

i was nowhere in the sea...
couldnt know where i was....
i lost all my directions...
mmm..., i knew that i was drowning...
i may die without knowing what was that!!!!

If i ask you to come back as soon as possible...
does it make sense??!!!
Im melting into this magnetic field where i've loaded with
illogical memories!
ah! EYES STARTED BLEEDING!

if i ask u to give me ur and n hold me
does it make any sense to u???!!!!
im scared, more n more scary scenes passing by...
the stillness and silence like an afternoon...like a gloomy sunday...
can swallow me..i know..

HEY I NEED YOU BADY!
never knew that this would happen to me..

it was a nursery rhyme which i was trying to remember!
its painful!

i thought i can forget..
n i still remember,

i thought i can never forget...,
and it just vanished!
what fun!!!

live n leave...
life!

death!

death............

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9............
it goes on.....
death............

ah!! its 12.22 pm

its terrible!


She feels terribly disappointed that im such a selfish n careless friend! i know she is in pain
both mentally and physically!
and look at me,sitting in this arm chair so kool relaxed and incredibly irresponsible!
there i goes!
hey stop it my kani!
my parasite!

now its too much!

yea true...i know...
i wonder y i live...!!??
y i even smile cry or whatever!
i've seen none other than me being "selfish" like this way!

HELLO friends...
if you can please dont help me to stand,breathe or live to exist such a pathetic way!
let me die..die on the spot!

I DONT DESERVE ANY OF YOUR LOVE!
just have to kil me!

people in my life..butterflies who used to dance with me..
o how beautiful you all are!
they loved me, listened to me always...
and what i did...i was hurting them all through my life... till now!
i should be killed!
its pathetic!


ah a rainbow!
just appeared in front of me!
BEAUTIFUL.... ITS 12.22 PM!

its about my body smell!

my body...,
it smells...
it smells ...
eternal fragrance...
hahha nothing...


it smells like fish! wohooo
sometimes its smells like...the earth...
sometimes it smells like turmeric...
it smells... anyway...

salty body!
stinky cat!